When you have been hurt in a previous relationship, it is hard to go into a new relationship without being a little wary. While being a bit more cautious can help you to avoid making the same mistake again. It can also make you so guarded that you are unable to commit completely to a new relationship.
Whilst it is important to learn from your mistakes, try not to become too obsessed with them. Although it can be hard to let down your guard and let someone new in, if the relationship goes well, it could be the best decision you have ever made.
To help you start a new relationship once you are ready to move on, here are some of our top tips:
1. Resolve past issues
Before diving into a new relationship, take the time to resolve any past issue you may have had after all you would not want to bring past pain and hurts into a new relationshp.
Make an appointment to see a therapist and work with them to understand what caused the problems in your last relationship. Ask yourself why your relationship broke down – was it because of you or your partner, or both of you?
Once you have worked out what caused the relationship to break down, you can work on your issues and then be ready to move on.
2. Take control
So, something bad happened in your previous relationship. It is important to remember that you are not a victim. You can and will move on.
Just because your last relationship did not end well, it doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve to be happy. Resolve to make conscious chioces, take control of your life and move on.
3. Pick carefully
Perhaps you have been hurt one too many times and don’t want to be hurt again. If this is the caes then it will help you to learn how to spot the early signs that your date may have some issues or values that are not compatible with what you are looking for.
As well as learning how to spot potential problems, it is just as important to have appropriate construct boundaries for yoursaelf so that you can stop the wrong kind of person getting anywhere near your heart.
It can often be hard to know whether someone is interested in you just by looking at them. To ensure that you don’t hit on anyone who isn’t interested, learn what to look for to know if someone is flirting with you. Believe it or not, body language is the biggest giveaway.
5. Know what you want
Get your expectations clear in your head. What do you want from your next relationship? Where do you want it to take you towards – love, marriage, babies? Be clear with any potential new partners what it is that you are looking for – be brave, don’t fool yourself, and don’t settle for any less.
6. Don’t give up – there are amazing people everywhere.
So, you may have had a bad experience with your last relationship but there are wonderful people everywhere. Don’t let one bad relationship turn you into a cynic.
Just think, with so many amazing people around, you are spoilt for choice in who you choose to be your next partner.
What do you think?
Breakups can be so hard and starting over can be really scary. Dating and creating a new relationship is a balancing act amd we all know that we have to kiss a lot of frogs before e find our prince or princess. We would love to hear your thoughts about breaking up and “getting back out there ” again so do share your experiences .
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