Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change. ~ Jim Rohn
Everyone wants to live a more positive life, but there are always negative influences that are trying to stop you. They might come from the outside or from within you. Wherever they come from, there are hundreds of things that put dents in your motivation, self-confidence and happiness. It could be a friend or family member who seems only to criticise you, or it could be a nasty habit that you can’t shake.
Negative thought patterns are a thing that can hold you back when you can’t help but assume the worst all the time. But you don’t want these bad influences to rule your life. If you want to stop them from controlling you, you need to cut them out. But this isn’t an easy thing to do, so don’t let it get you down if you can’t change your entire life in a day. Follow these steps to get rid of the negative influences in your life and start living more positively.
Surround Yourself with Positive People
The people we choose to spend our time with, as well as the ones we have no choice but to see, can have a tremendous impact on us. You can begin to internalise other people’s voices, as you start to believe the horrible things they say. You can probably think of at least one person in your life who always leaves you wishing that you hadn’t met up with them. Sometimes the best thing to do about them is to remove them from your life. But you aren’t always able to do that. Some people in your family or at work are unavoidable. So, as well as ending negative relationships, you should also learn to deal with them and balance them out with more positive ones.
If you decide that you’re better off without someone, make sure that you’re certain this is the right step. This drastic move is difficult to come back from, and you might not be able to fix your relationship. Cutting someone from your life is easier to do if it’s a friend. You don’t have to seem them, like you do your family, or to socialise with others who know them. It’s completely up to you whether you keep a friend around. Of course, you also get to choose if you want a family member in your life. Just be sure that you’re taking the right step to cut out someone who is uncaring, abusive or neglectful.
Some negative people are unavoidable. Maybe you have colleagues you can’t get along with, your best friend’s annoying partner or a critical family member you have to see during the holidays. When you can’t remove someone from your life, or decide not to, you can learn how to deal with them more positively. If you don’t, you could end up letting their opinions affect your life. There are lots of ways you can deal with the type of person who only seems to have bad things to say. One of them is simply to smile and detach yourself, ignoring what they tell you. But you can’t use this method in some places, such as at work. When you need to stay engaged, try to get them to balance out their thoughts with positive statements. Remember to focus on your own energy, and remind yourself that their negativity is their problem.
When you’re forced to have negative people in your life, make sure you balance them out with more positive influences. Choose to surround yourself with positive people and ward off other people’s negativity with your positivity.
Changing Your Lifestyle
Other people aren’t the only thing that can have a massive effect on your life. It’s very easy to get into bad habits that become ruling influences. When you look at your lifestyle, you can find that you’re dependent on something that has started dictating how you live. If you admit to and try to manage these addictions, you can become a happier and more confident person. It doesn’t matter if you need to receive alcohol addiction treatment, change your relationship with food or go on a technology detox. Nothing should rule your life in a way that makes you feel like you have to do it, even if it’s making you unhappy. Change these harmful influences to good ones, such as lots of different hobbies, exercise and socialising.
If you want to start thinking more positively, there are other parts of your lifestyle you can change. When your circumstances are making you think negatively, it can be a lot easier to change them than to change yourself. If your job is making you unhappy and you keep messing up, start looking for a new one. Address the things that are controlling your life and get to work on how you’re going to make things different from now on.
Combating Negative Thinking
You can only change your lifestyle if you think in a more positive way, and deal with negative thoughts properly. Avoiding negative people helps with this, but you also need to look deeper inside yourself. One of the best things to do to improve your life is to set goals and aims, so you have something to try for. But you need to look at your thought patterns to help you stay on track. When you’re thinking negatively, you should see where your thoughts and feelings are coming from to help you get to the root of the problem.
You can’t get rid of negative thoughts or situations altogether, but you can choose to focus on the good things. You can take away a positive from anything that happens to you, no matter how small. Maybe you had a terrible day, but someone was kind enough to hold a door open for you when you got to work. So you haven’t managed to lose any weight for a while – but you’ve resisted temptation and avoided the no-go foods in your diet plan. Positive thinking is about choosing to celebrate the good things and combat the bad by not letting it rule your life.
Now it’s time for your say?
Is being more positive something that you are aiming for in life? What methods have you tried? What has been successful for you? What would you recommend to others? And why?
As always, your interaction with our posts creates a reservoir of wisdom for all our readers to benefit from so please share your thoughts, stories and questions in the comments box below and remember to tweet, like and +1 ~ thanks
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hi iam battling a number of things including inferiority complex,which brings anger to me all the time.I think all my friends are better than me,feel left out.but what I have started with,is get a job,instead of spending more time in the bar will spend it at home,iam going to cut out some friends not because i don’t like them but its like they are doing me a favour to be with me, going to resort to healthy meals and cleaning my home. iam sure this will help.thank you all
I am very happy to hear that you feel inspired to take action to clear the negativity out of your life. Congratulations and good luck.
Hi, I am a newbie learning this kind of thing and I see now in my personal life why I was feeling and acting the way I did and I see why other people in my life acted the way they do. Its a real eye opene. Thank you so much for this artical.
I am also facing this negativity due to which I am feeling like a prey to others wishes. I am feared he(one of my colleague at work whom I have shared heart out) is controlling my life. I have been working in a company since 6 months but I didn’t like the place and wanted to leave. I started finding a way to leave out and eventually got in touch with this person who in first meeting seemed as if he is my savior, but to my disbelief, he has ruined my life and got into my thoughts constantly telling me that a newly joined person always has discomfort in the beginning but when one completes the job contract, he has a liking developed. But, I do not want to get attached to this workplace and return back home. So, I feel like I am trapped to get that thought out of my life. I am very depressed that I fell a prey to someone’ thoughts and allowed to dominate my mind. I am not able to take my own decisions with ease and remain unhappy all the time. Please advice me.
Thank you Maya…! Some of your advises are best suited to let go off the negativity in my life…now, I decided to work on them….
My negative thoughts happen mainly when I am on my own. When I’m with friends I’m very friendly and outgoing and everyone sees me as a happy positive person, I’m good at giving positive advice but not good at being positive myself. It mainly when I’m on my own when negative thoughts jump into my head, I don’t want to think think this way but I don’t know how not to.
Hello Scott. Sorry to hear that you are struggling with negative thoughts. Please take a look at the following post https://www.zenlama.com/5-easy-steps-that-help-you-build-self-confidence-with-meditation/ it is filled with advice and tips for quieting our Monkey Mind and for eliminating negative thinking.
His. .I’m fighting to be happy and positive some of my family members are negatives husband too..meeting them mean fighting everytime ..I come back home exhausted from fjghtjng back their negatives absolutely everything …though I love them..but I don’t know how much I’ll handle that ..I think one should be financially emotionally independent to fight ..I m less and less effected because I m optimistic by nature …and want my daughters to a follow good example ..